But I Prefer a Man Who Lives, and Gives Expensive Jewels

Christmas is almost here.  Shopping should be almost complete.  Last year, I had all of my gifts purchased by Black Friday.  It also didn't hurt that I was working somewhere for the season with an awesome employee discount and happened to do 100% of my shopping there.  This year, I have been on vacation and knitting like a mad woman and I have only bought one thing.  And!  I opened it.  This is not going well.  I always used to make comments about how funny it was that the male members of the family never knew what they had purchased for the gift exchange.  I could never understand why they didn't just do their own shopping.  Being married, I now know why.  Men are terrible with remembering who to buy for and what to buy them.  I feel like every Christmas I ask Mr. Cutthroat, "Hey there, what should we buy your Grandmother?"  And, every year, he says sugar free chocolates and a puffy vest.  EVERY YEAR.  "Hey babe, what should we buy your Grandmother for her birthday?"  Sugar free chocolates and a card.  You gotta give it the extra puffy vest for Christmas.  Now that I am here, I am making it a mission to make this Christmas more than sugar free chocolates.  I am not letting my husband pick the family gifts ever again.  At least he knows to stick to the jewelry for me.