Thursday, July 21, 2011

I Can't Stand It, I Know You Planned It

I am famous for many, many things.  To name but a few, I would have to say homemade German Chocolate cupcakes, awesome shuffleboarding skills, world-class defensive driving, and my ability to turn any event into a sporadic dance party.  My chief life skill is having never been outdone in a battle of wills.  This is going to change. 
Right now, I am in a battle of wills with my landlord, a faceless attorney, the lady who checks the mussels at Whole Foods, and one of my cats.  The one that concerns me is my landlord (although the battle with the lady at Whole Foods is going to need extra attention).  Josh, the 20-something Residential Studies major from Cadiz University, is going to ultimately win this epic battle of wills.  A rookie mistake is going to get me in the end.  I got the lease renewal a few weeks ago and they are raising our rent from astronomical to WTF.  Well, after several well-reasoned arguments from Mr. Cutthroat and a few snarky remarks from me, no progress was made.  We must move.  I came home and posted a truthful, though harsh, review of the company.  It was at that moment that my air conditioner went out.  I called and Josh put me on the bottom of the list.  It is 90 degrees in my apartment.  I may as well start doing Bikram Yoga.  And, I can't get my spinning wheel going in this heat because the thought of making yarn from wool is not at all appealing.  I even said that my mother was coming this weekend (true) and that she was elderly (kind of true).  This round goes to my landlord.  Now, I am scouring the internet looking for an apartment I can turn into a yarn studio, at least one with a working air conditioner for my elderly mother. 

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Now, I Know What I Got, It's Just This Song

Today, I was viciously snapped back to the memory of my single days.  With Mr. Cutthroat working such crazy hours for his own business, I was left to fend for myself for dinner.  I started plotting the prospect of having to make my own dinner tonight at around 11 AM.  It was more of a panic.  For those of you who do not know, Mr. Cutthroat's hobby is making delicious dinners.  He smokes meat, makes reductions out of fancy things, and plates the food to look like a restaurant.  I haven't had to make my own dinner for years.  And when I did, I ate either dry pancakes or blue box macaroni and cheese.  For a week, I ate peanut butter and jelly on saltines for dinner.  It wasn't that I was poor.  I just didn't care to try to make anything good.  It is any wonder I didn't get scurvy like an old timey pirate. 
I decided to embrace the day with the opportunity to eat like I did in my early 20s.  Sometimes, while he was making homemade noodles and Fontina cheese sauce, I would fantasize about having simple macaroni and cheese for dinner.  Sickening, I know.  When I came home, I started rummaging through the pantry and light shined through the ceiling on a lone box of Hamburger Helper stashed in the back.  I am not even sure how it got into our house.  In fact, it was expired.  I made it anyway.  Now, I'm wishing I would have just kept spinning yarn straight through dinner.  What was I thinking?  I will never wish for another dinner like that again.  Until, Mr. Cutthroat tries to make a fancy peanut butter and jelly sandwich on homemade saltines. 

Monday, July 18, 2011

Can't Stop Till I See My Name on a Blimp

Wholesaler?  I barely know her!

So, I have been busy, extremely busy.  And, as a result, I have had to abandon regular blog updates.  Around Memorial Day, I was spinning and letting my mind wander.  I thought about my Etsy page and what I could be doing better to get my yarn out to the knitting masses.  On a complete whim, I called my favorite yarn store in the D.C. area.  Looped Yarn Works is a cute store in Dupont Circle with such a beautiful collection of yarn.  I connected with the owners and asked if they would ever consider selling yarn of local spinners.  Tada!  This week, 3 Cutthroat Yarn dye lots will be joining the beautiful stock at their studio. 
I was so nervous in dyeing and spinning these particular skeins.  To get everything done, I had to promote Mr. Cutthroat to Chief Dye Inspector.  He is also Yarn Measurement Analyst (or Director of the Niddy Noddy, this one is still being negotiated) .  Oh, and he might also be the courier.  In any event, I need children.  I have to get my own little sweat shop rolling so we can make more progress.  I have been asking around about a sure-fire way to get multiple babies at once.  I am sure I could find a baby friendly carder that won't poke out their eyes or otherwise damage them in any way.  Another invention that I need to create.  And, I clearly need to because my furry frienemies have really taken no interest in participating in the family business.  It's clearly a problem.