Who wears a slutty _____ costume to work?
Today, I found myself asking that a lot. At times, the blank was filled with witch, cat, bee, and nurse. Actually, the nurse may have just been going to work, sexily administering an IV or erotically changing a bandage. Why is that even a sexy option? Most of what nurses do grosses me out because of blood, urine, vomit, and who knows what else. I can kind of understand the theory behind sexy witch. Some guys dig the mean girl vibe. I just can't get the point of dressing up in white and saying, "May I empty your bedpan?" in a whispery voice. Anyway, I digress. Which office has the option to slut it up in lieu of wearing a suit? Certainly not mine. I feel uncomfortable wearing a sleeveless shirt. For Halloween, I always dress up as something totally weird or gross. I always misplace the memo about looking attractive on October 31st.
But, I didn't dress up as anything this year! Mr. Cutthroat and I made no plans and it feels weird. Also, we live in an area where we get no trick-or-treaters. A sad double whammy! If I could take my cat out trick-or-treating, I would. I love Halloween.
We did make it to a haunted house this year, against Mr. Cutthroat's wishes. It was an outdoor trail. And, I should mention that it was 35 degrees. The trail was great, although I was a little thrown off by the music selection being played by the waiting area DJ. At first, we thought the music was decent with a little bit of Jay-Z and Lady Gaga. Then, as our group was waiting to be scared by teenagers wielding chainsaws, "How Great Thou Art" begun to play. Wait, was this a Hell House? By the time I got to the room with the heavy metal and clowns, I knew that it wasn't. Side-stepped that landmine!
Next year, I am vowing to dress up. I am going to take over a friend's house in a well-populated area in order to hand out candy. And, I am going to find a Hell House.
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